Most of us have a general understanding of the "fear of failure" syndrome. We all know that when something is that important to us, we do not want to see our dream vanish. No one ever wants to fail...especially when we fail at something we have always dreamt of pursuing.
Have you ever started working towards that long-held dream but weren't getting the results you thought you should have? Did you rationalize it by saying things like..."It was just something I wanted to try" or "it's no big deal" or "It wasn't that important anyway"? Perhaps you said those things because it was too hard to face the truth... or you just couldn't allow yourself to face the truth because it would crush you.
Or perhaps, more commonly, you simply just stopped working on the goals you set. You either change direction (to appear as if starting from square one) or you just stop working on it completely. Maybe you even begin a completely new project. Regardless of what you choose it seems the end result is the very same. Your pursuit of your original goals is long forgotten. Your "baby" has been abandoned.
That is what often happens when we have a fear of failure.
Are you a person who thinks they only have one shot at success? Do you feel that if you don't succeed at your first attempt that it is over for you? Do you feel that if you fail that your dreams and goals are destroyed completely?
For arguments sake, let's say that you dream of writing the newest "great American novel". You believe you have one chance to attain that dream. You begin to write and the words just begin to flow. You spend all your free time working on your novel. Finally the day comes that you complete it. You are so thrilled and excited. You submit your novel to numerous publishers.
Each day you wait on pins and needles for a response in your mailbox from a publisher telling you they want to publish your book. Days turn into weeks and weeks into months. The little voice in your head (fear of failure) keeps telling you your book is not good enough, that's why you have not heard back from anyone.
Then one day you open your mailbox and there it is. Your heart begins beating faster and your hands are shaking. You are so excited and nervous that you are afraid to open the envelope. You finally work up the nerve to open it and... there are the words you feared most... "We are sorry to inform you..."
Your hopes are dashed. Your dream has been murdered. You might even say something like..."what a fool I was" or "I knew I wasn't good enough". You then vow to "never write again". The "Fear of Failure" has now won the war. It has accomplished its goal.
That scenario is EXACTLY why many people choose NOT to reach for the stars. Let's face it, if we just dream about the success we want, we can never fail. We won't have to do all the hard work needed to make it happen. And we won't have to worry about the cold reality of numerous rejections or mistakes while trying to make our dream come true.
Let me assure you that belief is simply NOT true. If success was a "one shot deal" then this world would be a far different place. There are so many stories about successful people's failures. Thomas Edison is a prime example of that. He figured out about 10,000 ways to NOT make a light bulb. What if he had stopped after his first "failure"?
There are numerous examples all around the world, if you just look. My point is simply, if those who we perceive as successful had stopped pursuing their dream after just one attempt, we would have no idea of who they are today. They pursued their dreams vigorously until they succeeded. They looked at every setback as a new lesson on their way to success.
If you follow that logic, you can't help but to be successful.
